Tuesday, 25 August 2009
-
Currently
The Appeal
By John Grisham
see relatedJust... anxious
It’s raining outside – a good sign in this time of drought but it doesn’t personally feel too good. My feet feel cold as I take in a particularly long drag. I feel my senses awaken as the smoke hits my head. My heartbeat increases. The rain falls down harder and faster and my hands clutch the wheel as though it were my dying mother. My head is spinning now. The traffic gets worse. A white Maruthi drives itself into the sidewalk a little ahead. There is chaos. My heart is racing at this point and my senses are so awake that I can feel every beat, one after the other, throbbing against my chest like a wild creature trying to escape. Sounds of horns all around me of vehicles trying to meander their way around the accident, anxious to get home, seem heightened, and echo into my ears. My head seems to be in unison with my heart, hammering in tune with its beats, making it difficult for me to even blink. Everything but time moves in slow motion, like my life thus far.
As I inch forward in this utter chaos, Fear hits me like the smoke did. That is what my heart was trying to get away from: fear. Fear of being ridiculed in front of someone I look up to. Fear of having him look at me in a disappointing sort of way. Fear of having my already shitty college look even shitter in front of all those intellectual people. Fear of being tongue-tied, of losing control of myself when questions are being thrown at me like light bolts. I suddenly realise that I am not prepared mentally and physically to face all those people. I don’t have a presentation ready. The paper is beginning to fade in my head. It’s getting too cloudy up there with all the smoke and all the Sims. The lens seems to be getting out of focus. And I have exactly seven days to get back on track and chisel the wood. Is there still time, or is it already too late?
-
recommend
- recs 0
-
share
-
email
- sent 0
Post a Comment